Mentors - Cry & Chris Black

[Cody Nash]

Mentors
By: Cry & Chris Black





^in that order...






I remember back then...
yes, back then... it was when the real pieces happened,
our mentors bettered us without us havin' to ask them,
when our shit was wack, we were told it was wack then!
and now we lack tens, but still get judged that...
I miss when bad writers were exposed for just that!
"you suck; wack..." replys I got when I dropped,
and still tellin' me I had a "nice drop" when I'm hot....
it was good critiquing, so why stop?
10/10? fuck, back then for me a five rocked...
I was tryn'a be great with dry rot in my structure,
Bounce'd say: "you should'a fixed that line up first,"
and in next piece I'd have "that line" covered....
wrote each piece like it was my lover,
how I smothered each mistake with the right attention,
I liked correction... and how time was essence...
it felt like direction - yep! cry was a feature film,
and Tim, Born, Johnny-6... all worked on makin' that feature ill...
they preached for skill, like spreadin' the word of God...
even a preacher would'a told his people if the Bible was worded wrong,
he wouldn't support them all... he'd do his part unto you...
something that today, isn't hard not to do....
and shit... ya'll are so far from the truth, it all seems radial...
while I'm feelin' like such a Realist that they should call me Gabriel,
correctin' all things insatiable... breakin' the tape on the red door,
stayin' well respected... when I give feed - I get more
but I'm a mentor, and I'm blessed I've made it,
when a piece ain't breathin', Cry's resuscitatin',
vets, let's get up and save 'em... these kids stink,
but watch out, negative feed has 'em windin' to hit shrinks,
-when they should be dyin' to know what guys like Chris thinks...



Honestly, I don’t hate you folks.
When I say something is wack, it’s to make you dope.
I pray you cope, and take all this shit as a lesson,
cause I tried to leave you, but the shit is depressin’.
I wont let you drown, because I see you as my kids,
so I’ll say: “that was trash,” even if you don’t like it.
I’m going to show you the box, and then push you outside it
Crush your comfort zone, and then force you try shit
Smoka said: “vote against me, I’m done with open mics.”
Then I voted for him - an attempt to open eyes.
He thought he couldn’t win just being himself.
I saw something in him, he didn’t see in himself.
He can win the tourney, even if he don’t know it.
I want him to be better - that’s the way that I showed it.
Trust you can grow. Shit, you have the flow, kid.
You’re on the right road, so please don’t blow it. .
. . I feel the same for Mariah - not laughing at her.
I really meant it, when I said she shat on her verse.
She felt pressure to conform, and I know that it’s hard,
So I said: “Fuck the voters, just go with your heart.”
Sometimes I nit-pick cause I know that you’re better,
and I hope you all will please go through this letter.
I want the level of writing to just raise a bit.
If that makes me a bad guy, I’m embracing’ it,
but when I give you feed, stop hating Chris,
Cause you need to worry when I stop saying shit. . .


. .That means I’ve given up on you

[Cody Nash]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...de-376754.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...in-376489.html

[SmokaJoka]

thanks for the boost Chris, I'll leave more extensive feed in a bit...I was thinking it was a diss at first when you showed me in that other thread...lol

[Engivale]

Guys, that was pretty straight up awesome and I totally agree with most everything. Really well rhymed, this was just straight from the heart from both of you and its obvious, this is when the best shit gets written, when it just GETS WRITTEN. I think there's some nitpicking for me to do so I can just be real cuz that's what the piece is about, lol.

Cry, GREAT opener.

I remember back then...
yes, back then... it was when the real pieces happened,
our mentors bettered us without us havin' to ask them,
when our shit was wack, we were told it was wack then!
and now we lack tens, but still get judged that...
I miss when bad writers were exposed for just that

Straight up awesome, seriously.

Then this line hit me so nice:

correctin' all things insatiable... breakin' the tape on the red door,
stayin' well respected... when I give feed - I get more

I love that you looked up the correct spelling for resuscitate. Bravo. Only part that kinda sucked was near the end of ur verse.

ets, let's get up and save 'em... these kids stink,
but watch out, negative feed has 'em windin' to hit shrinks,

But pretty dope opener. And now Chris...

Honestly, I don’t hate you folks.
When I say something is wack, it’s to make you dope.
I pray you cope, and take all this shit as a lesson,
cause I tried to leave you, but the shit is depressin’.

I just don't like "pray you cope" because it seems awkward for a rap verse, the word "cope" i guess is always a weird one for me. but overall a good opener.

I wont let you drown, because I see you as my kids,
so I’ll say: “that was trash,” even if you don’t like it.
I’m going to show you the box, and then push you outside it
Crush your comfort zone, and then force you try shit

^^^fucking dope, show you the box then push you outside it... Nice line.

He can win the tourney, even if he don’t know it.
I want him to be better - that’s the way that I showed it.
Trust you can grow. Shit, you have the flow, kid.
You’re on the right road, so please don’t blow it. .

First of all, not if I have anything to say about it. And flow is MY thing, lol, not smoka's, so I also object to him having the flow, but, he's got the creativity =D

. . I feel the same for Mariah - not laughing at her.
I really meant it, when I said she shat on her a verse.

^^^needs to be fixed, the shat on her a verse part

End was dope.



Good job, guys, very entertaining, real, and personal piece. Better than me and Cry's collab, I'm afraid, lol, but I think we kinda forced that topic. W/e. Good job, guys, nom'd.

[Chris Black]

Good looking Eng. I guess I say things different from most. I actually said she shat on her verse once, in a mag. Lol.

[Engivale]

it's the "a verse" part that's awkward, read it slow, dude, it's just a typo from editing I think.

[Chris Black]

it's the "a verse" part that's awkward, read it slow, dude, it's just a typo from editing I think.

Yeah, you're right. Thanks.

[Cody Nash]

he's talking about the letter a being in between her and verse lol... I edited it out. didn't notice that when I read over your shit lol.

[Daz]

looks dope.

[Fatal.]

Wow you guys had me very entertained from reading this peice. i liked the explanation of your thoughts about feed, and people's improvement, thought it was pretty creative and interesting. flow was very nice, multies and internals were very nice as well.

My fav lines from cry:

yes, back then... it was when the real pieces happened,
our mentors bettered us without us havin' to ask them,
when our shit was wack, we were told it was wack then!
and now we lack tens, but still get judged that...
I miss when bad writers were exposed for just that!
"you suck; wack..." replys I got when I dropped,
and still tellin' me I had a "nice drop" when I'm hot....
it was good critiquing, so why stop?
10/10? fuck, back then for me a five rocked...
I was tryn'a be great with dry rot in my structure,
Bounce'd say: "you should'a fixed that line up first,"

^thought this was dope

My fav lines from Chris:

I wont let you drown, because I see you as my kids,
so I’ll say: “that was trash,” even if you don’t like it.
I’m going to show you the box, and then push you outside it
Crush your comfort zone, and then force you try shit
Smoka said: “vote against me, I’m done with open mics.”
Then I voted for him - an attempt to open eyes.
He thought he couldn’t win just being himself.
I saw something in him, he didn’t see in himself.
He can win the tourney, even if he don’t know it.
I want him to be better - that’s the way that I showed it.
Trust you can grow. Shit, you have the flow, kid.
You’re on the right road, so please don’t blow it. .

^also thought this was dope

Overall i liked this alot. both did a great job.

return the feed and hit up my collab. thanks

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...it-376773.html

[Nemesis.]

damn,.. this was sick.

in all honesty, there was one or two spots where I felt the multi was a lil forced with the wording,..but it was a long verse. So, thats solid.. the concept was nice.. original, after readin it, I wanna get better with my writtens cuz of how you wrote this. The fact you two are two veterans who have been writing for a while, fit the concept perfectly.. an which is why it worked so well, cuz this is how you guys truely feel.. the emotion was pretty raw, you both had a nice rhyme scheme.. vocab fit the piece. flowed good.. good shit guys, I see its already been nom'd or I woulda nom'd it.



either's coo
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...es-376782.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...wn-376278.html

[Ntalek]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....html?t=376898

Here you go!^^^

This was a dope drop...in all honesty...I think cry really opened this one up...you all stated a lot of facts on how people leave feed now a days..and everyone afraid to be honest when they do...I thought both flow were on point and this was a great drop along with all the other shit that's been going on in OM...kinda like the opposite of Daz's Stop Sucking Dick drop...seeing as you both were saying how you'd leave proper feed no matter wut the read thinks..and touching on how you yourself as a writer got better...so all in all this was a great read..I would nom it but it's already nom'd...so props on a good read fellas..

[Cody Nash]

thanks guys... appreciate it.

[Spoken Deity]

This is more than amazing...
The content was brilliant. A few of these verses have been done now but this is on entire different level. For the most part, a simple rhyme scheme but intelligent sentence structure. As far as an OM goes, it has everything needed... Cry, the preacher thing was more than fucking amazing. Well done sir.
This entire OM gets me amped and makes me want to be a better writer. Seriously, is amazing. I can only talk so much on the devices of this drop, but I can talk for ages and think about the message. Seriously, everyone should read this shit
Thanks guys

[Born To Kill]

Very fuckin nice...

It's the piece that inspired the one I just dropped.

This shit is why I write.

Very dope, great rhymes...great fuckin message.

TRUTH!

Peace